wala

walang pera!!!

joke: You got what you wanted but then you just ain't good enough: you feel like you don't deserve it at all

God is the funniest man I've ever known.

humor: Whenever we get bitter, my father buys me Nai Cha. mmm... bittersweet


eto na naman ako sa blog ko. tatae na naman. malapit ko na nga tong palitan ng "tumataeako.blogspot.com" ewan ko ba.

Ayun... lam ko malaki na ang pagkukulang ko sa maraming tao sa paligid. I've ignored most of the people. I want focus. Pero wala pa rin. Kulang pa rin. Kulang na kulang.

I am sure, hindi ako sanay. Hindi ako nagsasawa. It's always a happy feeling every time. Every time, I still feel lucky. Sometimes, I feel unworthy. I look into a wonderful blessing and I always thank God. Sometimes I ask why. I always hope. It's always a wonderful feeling. It's never normal.

Maybe it's that. Maybe because I was always amused. I was always trigger happy. I was always wide-eyed. And the time that I failed to look so, everything crushed. Was that it?

I knew. But what could I do?

Peter Parker said, we always have a choice. Sometimes, I feel that I don't. Maybe Peter was being utopian. Because he HAD a choice. Did Flint/sandman have a choice? Was there time to think of choices? His daughter was dying. He had no money. Probably he didn't have any job. So he robbed. That time when he shot Peter's uncle, was there time to choose? It was an accident, dammit. He was pushed, he accidentally pulled the trigger. Could he have stopped that? Was there a choice? He did what was right when he had the choice.

What is my point? Ewan. Di ko rin alam.

When certain words are said, sometimes, I feel that I've done nothing right. Every thing crumbles in front of me.

Sometimes, we find no choice but to crumble.
Sometimes we know yet we cannot do.
Sometimes we just can't help it.
Soemtimes, I just don't know what to do anymore.
You said, maybe there's nothing that can be done.

I know I'm bad. I couldn't help it. And I have no choice but to crumble.

What do I do?
I know I'm a threat but I can't let go.

Horoscopes are jinxes.


counter (ng ego): Maybe I always do them and they are not appreciated anymore. It's usual. It's expected. It's not new anymore. Nakakasawa na. I've become so redundant. It's not true na nagsasawa ako.

counter-ego: It's my fault for just not making everything new. For doing the same things over and over. For doing what was expected.

And if I change to break monotony, "I've changed".

What do I do?

Sometimes, what do I say do not matter. So go ahead drawing your own conclusions. And I accept. And I am sorry.


God gave is grace. God gave a gift of salvation. Then we are all reminded that we are sinners and we do not deserve what is given. Thus we have to be eternally thankful. The blood on the cross makes us guilty, don't you think? I do not know about the law of heaven and hell. I do not know why there existed such agreement that Jesus had to become human and shed blood for the humans to be saved. Why can't God just blast the devil down and lock hell forever? Why is the devil allowed to snatch souls? Why is hell allowed to expand its territotry? Why can't it all be ended fast and quick so no additional souls have to suffer? I do not understand at all.

Why are we given a choice between the good and the evil? Sometimes, we do not have a choice but to do bad. Why can't we have no choice but to be good?

Maybe because sometimes, we need to see the bad to appreciate the good.
Sometimes, when we see the bad, we don't see the good.



Then maybe, I'm altogether wrong.
Maybe I do not understand at all... anything at all.